"I think your light is coming back."

Last week, my bonus brother said to me: “Ibiza did you well, right?” I said: “Yeah! How?” “’Cause before, you looked depressed, and I think your light is back.”

Rewind back to Ibiza, where I’m dancing on a balcony overlooking the ocean, after having told my new friends my latest life story. One of them observes me while I dance and says to me: “I think your burnout is gone.” I’m laughing – I check in with myself. I feel I’m not there yet. Yet I was able to recognize that I definitely felt energetic – the best I had felt in over a year.

And if you don’t know me yet, that could have looked like the energetic whole version of me. Yet I know deep down that I’ve only just put my head above the enormous dark and deep pit I was in-out: It will take me still a lot more patience, flow, continued growth, expansion, accountability, rest and strength to get to the point where I can climb out of it fully and put my feet back on the ground, feel the sun in my face and know it’s shining its light again on me and out of me equally. 

Yet, it seems so amazing to feel little waves of light energy coming back into my life. This moment reminded me to lock in this present realization of growth. Acknowledging you still have so much more to go, and, at the same time, holding grace for the road you have already traveled, can come together in a sweet spot of gratitude.

Therefore, I have to acknowledge that these two comments were the most amazing mirrors, reflecting back to me my growth. I’m going UP! Life is confirmed for me. No matter how dark, how deep or how low you feel down there, eventually, your sun will start shining again, as long as you keep growing.

My first glances of true light started again this past summer. Thank you, Europe. Thank you, burnout. Thank you, rock bottom. Thank you for allowing me to feel it all. I’m not the same person anymore.

I'm rising.

“Gratitude” is an understatement.

“You will be amazed at how things magically fall into place when you let go of the illusion of control.” – Maryam Hasnaa